Is It Too Late?

Well, I've been asking myself that question for quite some time now. The reason behind it has actually got to do with making a career shift at such a late stage of my life. I'm not sure if it is possible, whether or not I'm too selfish for even thinking about it, whether or not I have the time to dive into something totally new (which means that I'll need to take a course, train and somehow get my portfolio up and running to score jobs!) Ultimately, the ability to find work in this newfound career will tell me that the decision has been worth it.

Okay, so what's this new interest all about? Well, actually it is not a new interest, since I've been passionate about it ever since I could remember, going back into my teenage years! It is, in fact, make-up. Some of you who know that I've always been in the journalism industry for most of my post-university life might think, "whoa, this is totally unrelated." And they are right! For most of my work life, I've never really written about beauty so much, more in the music, trade, travel and a little bit of fashion. I can't blame people for thinking that this would be such a silly, and very risky move, if I decide to pursue it.

This thought to dive into the make-up artistry industry started swirling in my mind vehemently since last year and I've not been able to put it out. I'm not sure if this is telling me something. I've been obsessed with anything Urban Decay, MAC and other beauty products, like OPI, Benefit or Bliss. In fact, when I finally managed to grab hold of Urban Decay's star product, the Naked palette, I was beyond ecstatic that the Chubby Hubby thought I had gone cuckoo.

And I think he has also noticed my infinite obsession with make-up and beauty products. I seem to always be on youtube to look out for tutorials, and find it amazing that such a simple thing as your make-up can give the appearance of a changed facial dimensions and shapes, beautifying everything and everybody, no matter what they look like with a naked face. This is one of the reasons, however shallow it may sound, that I love, love, love make-up so much.

So, this has led me to browsing online for places that offer make-up courses around the island. And the Chubby Hubby has even kindly offered to pay for my lessons, should I feel that this was what I wanted to do. Since he's in the film industry, he's even said that I could follow him on shoots whenever there's a need for a make-up artist. So, woohoo to that as it would definitely be great to build up my portfolio.

But, no surprises here, I feel like I'm too scared to follow through. Not only will this be a major career change, I'm not sure if people will like what I do to their faces, whether or not I am cut out to be a make-up artist. "What if I suck?" is a thought that wanders in my mind constantly. My heart is in it, but I don't know if my head is telling me that this is the right thing for me. I think it might be my age talking. The older I get, the less risks I seem to be willing to take as I develop more fear for the "unknown".

I guess until I am able to overcome this fear, I will never be able to make the right decision. But then again, what is deemed as the right decision? All that should matter is the passion you have for whatever it is you are pursuing, as this will form the foundation of your happiness, right?

When I am sure of the path to take, I will no doubt update you again. In the meantime, I have some soul searching and ass-kicking to do before I can come to a decision.